Should be: "FIT BY '41, MAYBE '42" as in the YEAR 2042. Compulsive over eater, and it is hard to change old habits. Not giving up. Hip bursitis and plantar fasciitis have added to the difficulty but also to the necessity to shed the extra 80 pounds. Have to get over embarrassment of exercising in front of others because without some sort of exercise, I drop back into depression and coping with food. Including tracking calories thanks to free websites that make it doable. (Updated 2-22-12)
Oh, the aroma! Sweet heaven. I love the smell of coffee. It brings back great childhood memories of waking up every day to the familiar and comforting scent of my father's coffee.
When Danny and I were first married in '95, we used to enjoy our morning coffee together. We had our own bean grinder and would explore different flavors. At night, we enjoyed our beer and brandy. We fell in love over Malibu rum and Bob Marley. In the morning, we'd start another day with some java.
This went on until 1999 when we both decided to stop addictive substances, particularly alcohol and coffee.
We were fortunate enough to be able to give up those items without too much trouble. We were abstinent for many, many years.
But, I became a coffee-drinker, again. It didn’t happen overnight. It began with caffeine tablets once per month to help me through PMS. Then it became ½ tsp instant coffee once per month. The coffee use joe-balled to more and more – stronger doses, more days per month, more times per day. I would stay up later, telling myself I’d make up for it with a cup of coffee in the morning. The longer my to-do lists became, the more I would drink. I had many excuses to justify my use.
I wasn’t getting the same effect as I once did. It used to make me happier, brighten my day, reduce my anxiety, ward off depression, and give me enough energy for the demands of motherhood. Towards the end, I was more tired with uneven moods. I felt I had to have it and was dependent on it. It certainly didn’t help control my appetite; if anything, it stimulated it.
I’ve been studying intuitive eating and exercising the past several months.Those things emphasize listening to the body.It dawned on me that I was not listening to my body’s cues and was instead trying to manipulate them with coffee.
About that time, I became ill. I thought this was a perfect time to completely detox from caffeine. I felt horrible anyway, what were a few more caffeine headaches/migraines?
That was a few weeks ago, and I see and feel a huge difference now that I vowed to not drink coffee anymore. I wake easily in the morning. I fall asleep faster at night. I do get tired in the afternoon, but instead of ignoring my body’s signal for rest, I honor it and sit or lie down for 5-10 minutes with my eyes closed. I’m not groggy afterwards. To perk up (and if I have time), I take a 10-20 minute walk. Sometimes dancing around the kitchen is a good substitute. And, without the stimulating caffeine, I can also listen to my body’s true hunger cues. My next goal is to simplify my life so I don’t have a marathon of activities tempting me to bring on the brew, again.
I still love the smell and have a coffee-scented candle. Gotta say, though, it feels good to be decoffeenated.